🤍 Reconciling with Yourself: The Healing We Forget to Embrace

I came across a video by Stephanie Ng'ang'a that really got me thinking about something we often overlook: reconciling with ourselves. It’s something we’re not taught to prioritize, yet it can be one of the most freeing experiences of our lives. I couldn’t help but reflect on how many times we give second chances to others but struggle to do the same for ourselves.

It’s funny, isn’t it? How we can extend grace to friends, family, and even strangers, but when it comes to ourselves, we hold on to grudges that cut deeper than anything others could have done. We push ourselves to the limits, always striving to do better, to be better, but somewhere along the way, we forget the most important part of the journey: making peace with ourselves.

What Does Reconciliation with Yourself Look Like?

Reconciliation, to me, isn’t just about forgiving the other person who hurt you or the situations that made you feel small. It’s about learning how to forgive yourself—for the times you’ve fallen short, the moments where you let doubt take control, or the decisions you regret.

The truth is, none of us come with a manual. No one prepares us for the emotional battles that come our way. But there’s power in choosing to look back—not with shame or regret, but with understanding. Reconciliation isn’t about forgetting the past. It’s about embracing the lessons and allowing ourselves to heal.

Steps Toward Self-Reconciliation

If you’ve been carrying around a heavy heart, weighed down by your own judgment, this is the time to let it go. Here are a few steps to help you begin the process:

• Acknowledge Your Pain – You can’t heal from what you refuse to face. Recognize where you’ve been too hard on yourself.
• Challenge the Inner Critic – Would you speak to a friend the way you speak to yourself? If not, it’s time to shift your inner dialogue.
• Practice Self-Compassion – Mistakes are part of growth. Remind yourself that failure does not mean unworthiness.
• Give Yourself Permission to Move Forward – Holding onto guilt won’t change the past, but releasing it will help shape a better future.
• Celebrate Small Wins – Healing isn’t linear. Acknowledge the moments when you choose self-forgiveness over self-judgment.

You Deserve Peace

I know it’s hard. Sometimes, it feels like you're standing on a cliff, afraid to step forward because you're not sure if you're worth the leap. But let me tell you this: You are worthy of healing. You are worthy of peace. Your mistakes do not define you, and every scar is a testament to the strength you didn’t know you had.

It’s okay if you don’t have it all figured out right now. Reconciliation isn’t a one-time thing. It’s a process—an ongoing dialogue with yourself where you learn to be kinder, gentler, and more forgiving.

So, take a moment. Look at yourself in the mirror and ask: “What would it take for me to forgive myself today?” Take that first step, and know that it’s okay to not have all the answers. The only thing that matters is that you’re trying. You're fighting for your peace. You're fighting to reclaim your worth, one forgiving moment at a time.

If you could speak to yourself with the same kindness you give others, what would you say?

"You deserve the same kindness you so freely give to others. It’s time to make peace with yourself." 🤍✨